Saturday, May 23: Nana and I went into town. She bought me a jersey, skivvy and neat grey skirt. Nana...I love you! Did a bit of painting around home. Had another fight with dad. I am really starting to hate him. I'm never allowed at Emma's again cause he reckons its not safe. BULLSHIT!!!

He is gonna start R&R and is forcing Darren to do it too. If Dad goes I'm gonna quit. He's doing it to keep an eye on me! I've never felt murderous before...

Tuesday, May 19: Today is one of the worst in my history.
Last night we got busted at Cedrics. It was 12:00. Darren went over about 11:00 and got sooo pissed he was spewing everywhere and nearly unconscious. All 4 of us (not Darren) got stoned and pissed on Vodka and coke. Cedric started making moves on me. He's an ex. kisser and knows what to do but I didn't want to screw him (trying to stick to my vow pg. April 10). I ended up saying no and standing up to leave. He followed me down the hall saying "did I upset you etc".

Why can't guys be your friend without screwing the shit outta you. Im so pissed off. I had thought he wass different. They're all the same. Dean made a few suttle moves on Emma but nothing happened.

Anyway, Dad took Emma home and Darren and I are grounded. Fuck its a piss off 'cause I had heaps'a plans this week too.

Friday, May 1: I asked Dad if I could go to a party with Emma and all my mates after Rock n Roll tonight. We, Emma and I were invited but didn't have a ride so we couldn't go. Then one of the guys, Mark, said he could pick us up. Dad said NO!! because he didn't know Mark! Bastard! I so complained. Then he said he didn't want me going to R&R because I've been out too much and he didn't want to pick me up. (Nana could bring me home, so thats just an excuse.) I screamed at him. Everything under the sun. I bawled my eyes out and am going to snob him all weekend. I've only got to put up with all this for 5 more months because then i'll be 16 and am leaving home. I can't wait.

Right now I hate my father.

Friday, April 24: We had a 1/2 day so I went to Emma's for the afternoon, then down to work. I had a muck up with Dad through the telephone so he came to pick me up from Emma's afterwards and I couldn't go to R&R. I hated him.